Fear and Fierce

Fear and Fierce

Dark and light.
 
Sad and happy.
 
Bad and good.
 
Fear and fierce.
 
Doubt and daring.
 
I’ve been thinking about both…all of them.
All sides. The extremes.
 
I’ve judged them.
 
Especially, when they show up inside me.
 
All the positive feelings make me good.
 
All the negative feelings make me bad.
 
In my brain, I’ve known that’s false.
 
Really and truly believing neither is good or bad…just existing inside me?
 
Not what I’ve been doing.
 
Not really.
 
Here on my feed…
 
I’ve been talking about:
 
Less fear. More fierce.
 
Etc
 
No matter what I did it didn’t feel right but I couldn’t figure out why.
 
I realized I was judging the fear.
 
Believing it shouldn’t be there.
 
Isn’t that interesting?
 
My last name is Fear.
 
Does that mean, on some level I was thinking I needed to be different?
 
I shouldn’t be here?
 
I think so.
 
In fact, I think many of us do this in little ways.
 
We judge parts of us.
 
Believe those parts shouldn’t exist.
 
If those parts went away or disappeared, then we could fixed…whole…
 
Fully us.
 
But that’s a stinkin big lie.
 
Both sides are parts of us.
 
All of it is us.
 
The dark and the light.
 
That’s awesome!
 
Good news!
 
If we didn’t have the dark we wouldn’t even be able to see the light.
 
If we couldn’t see our selfishness we wouldn’t see our selflessness.
 
And what the heck is wrong with being selfish anyway?
 
What if being selfish is sometimes helpful and needed?
 
What if we could love our selfishness AND our selflessness?
 
What if we stopped judging ourselves?
 
When God said not to judge is was because it would make us miserable.
 
That starts with ourselves!
 
What if that scripture isn’t about judging other people at all?
 
What if it’s only about not judging ourselves?
 
So instead of less fear and more fierceness…
 
How about we love our fear…are actually grateful for it.
 
As we love our fear, we lean into our fierceness…
 
Knowing we need both.
 
Fear and fierce.
 
Loving and accepting both.
 
This is our wholeness.
 
 
 
 

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